When Ebony and Dontray Hemphill’s son, DJ, was 10, he was involved in an altercation with another student at school and was disciplined according to school protocols.
But the parents of the other child wanted more of a punishment and sought to have DJ charged with a crime, brought before a judge and given a police record. They wouldn’t meet with the Hemphills to discuss the situation.
DJ was in the sixth grade at Maple Street Magnet School for the Arts when the altercation occurred in October 2019. “I had an incident, and they were trying to send me away to the juvenile home and do all this crazy stuff that wasn’t really necessary,” says DJ, now 17 and a senior who will graduate from Phoenix High School this month.
His mother says, “The appropriate consequences were rendered by the school according to the Student Conduct Code. His suspension was three days, and it was his only suspension. The parents of the other student wanted a longer suspension. After the school denied that, there was police involvement.”
Fortunately, the Hemphills had the time and resources to counter the actions of the other parents. They had each other, and they had support from people who knew DJ and advocated on his behalf to prosecutors in the Kalamazoo County justice system.
“Once we got DJ cleared,” his father says, “we knew we had to do something to be fair to the community who helped us help our son, so we founded Bent Not Broken.”
Protecting youths’ rights
Established in 2023 as a nonprofit, Bent Not Broken is an advocacy organization for youth going through the juvenile justice system, providing guidance and resources to ensure that both youth and their guardians are well informed, actively engaged in the legal process, and equipped to make informed decisions. The organization’s goal is to foster collaboration, protect the rights of youth, and promote rehabilitation and positive outcomes for both the young person and their family.
Ebony is the founder and executive director of the organization, and Dontray directs youth development and community engagement. DJ is a youth lead within the organization who, his mother says, stands up to bullies in school and “is learning to use the right words to tell somebody to leave somebody else alone.”
Ebony says that even prior to the incident with DJ, she knew she wanted to do something to help youth. “I didn’t know what or how or why,” she says, “but I had the name” Bent Not Broken, which is an affirmation that, while youths might occasionally get into trouble, they are not necessarily bad people and don’t belong in jail.
At the time, Ebony worked at Kalamazoo Central High School, managing student enrollment, attendance data and demographic records to ensure compliance with reporting requirements for state funding.
Dontray was a barber and a contract employee helping local social service organizations develop community organizing campaigns to bring about greater solidarity among neighborhood residents.
They were also raising their three children: Daiyana, now 25, Layla, now 19, and DJ.
The Hemphills originally operated Bent Not Broken out of their home in the Milwood neighborhood. Ebony met mothers and fathers anywhere they could meet: in coffee shops, libraries, their homes.
“One mom said, ‘I got two other kids. I don’t have no babysitter.’ So, we met in a park,” Ebony recalls.
Bent Not Broken is now housed at the Douglass Community Association, on West Paterson Street, and funded by grants from several local entities. It has a staff of six and intentions to hire two more this year. The organization is currently assisting 22 youths and families and in the past three years has helped between 75 and 100 youths and families.
“It’s so hard not to say yes to people,” Ebony says, “so I’m on a relentless pursuit of additional funding so we can reach our max of helping 50 youths at a time.”
Bent Not Broken works closely with the Youth Juvenile Justice Fellowship of the Lewis Walker Institute for the Study of Race and Ethnic Relations, at Western Michigan University, and with the Community Violence Intervention (CVI) network in Kalamazoo.
Bent Not Broken also collaborates with Boys & Girls Clubs; Charlie’s P.L.A.C.E., which provides education, athletics and leadership skill development for youth; Dominica’s Promise, a nonprofit dedicated to helping underserved women and at-risk youth; Peace During War, a Kalamazoo-based anti-gun violence organization; Sports Kickback, which empowers youth through sports; Starting Life After Prison, a program that helps people who have served time reintegrate into society; and the Urban Alliance, whose vision is to see people become spiritually, physically, economically and socially health.
“We’re one big circle, and we work together,” says Dontray.
Teaching purpose
In addition to helping families navigate the challenges of the legal system, Bent Not Broken provides mentorship, school study guidance and tutoring for young people. It helps them find seasonal jobs — endeavors suggested by the youth leads and designed to teach purpose, put some money in the youngsters’ pockets and keep them out of the judicial system.
Ebony says she has engaged with young people who are hungry and tell her, “‘We don’t have money, and that’s why I got caught inside someone’s car, looking for change.'”
“Some are facing insecurities that make them do things that are not good,” she says. “And some don’t know why they do things that get them in trouble; they say they’re bored.”
But Bent Not Broken’s most dramatic efforts occur within the judicial system: in jails, courts and the county juvenile detention facility. They utilize “participatory defense,” a community organizing model designed to engage the family and loved ones of the person who is going through the system.
“Most people go to court alone, so we join them in the courtroom to show the individual we’re here for them,” Ebony says. “I am extremely proud of every parent who steps up and advocates for their child. The process is heavy. It’s emotionally draining. If you’ve never had to go through the system with your child or the child you’re caring for, you cannot fathom the emotional baggage that goes with it.”
With passion, she speaks of “the games of random court dates at random times” and says that “some parents run out of capacity.”
“They run out of vacation time. Some people work two jobs to make sure they have a roof and food, and they don’t have the time to sit down and figure out what they’re going to do,” she says. Also, some don’t have the technological skills or easy access to a computer and the internet to research their options.
Ebony describes the harsh reality of parents with numerous children and the emotional struggle they may experience if one of the children faces school discipline or judicial detention. “If you’re a mom of four boys and one gets into trouble and you don’t have the bandwidth for it, you might say, ‘I cannot do this’ and just let the child go,” she says. “Or some take it head-on and ask, ‘What do I need to do?’ And sometimes they simply say, ‘Hey, can you help?’”
‘Not broken’
Bent Not Broken cautions parents that the judicial system often demands that the accused make a quick decision about whether to plead guilty or innocent.
“Maybe you were at work, so you don’t know if your kid did it or not. You have not had an opportunity to see the evidence, talk to your kid, poll attorneys. You don’t really know what’s going on until 30 minutes before court, maybe an hour, and then they want you to, boom, make a decision.”
She tells parents, “Don’t do anything rash. Don’t make a decision that could affect your child’s entire life. Tell your attorney you need time to look at the evidence.”
She tells the story of someone — not a Kalamazooan — who, at age 28, was denied a job because of something he did at 14, even though the judicial system had told him the incident had been removed from his record.
Reflecting on the incident with DJ, Ebony says, “We were blessed that legal action didn’t move forward. And if you’re spiritual at all, you know things don’t happen to you; they happen through you for somebody else.
“That good thing done for DJ has turned (in)to (our) supporting other youth and families and parents who don’t have enough energy at the end of their workday to even figure out what type of shenanigan their kid is in.”
She shows motherly pride in her son. She says that DJ, having seen classmates at school get into trouble, has come to her and Dontray and said, “They need help. Are we going to help them?”
One youth at a time, Bent Not Broken is helping young people prove to themselves and others, “I am not broken.”
To contact Bent Not Broken, either because you need help or want to help, visit the organization’s website, www.bentnotbroken.org, or send an email to advocate@bentnotbroken.org. Ebony Hemphill also offers her personal phone number: 269-552-8092. And she extends an invitation to those who need assistance to attend a Bent Not Broken meeting. The meetings are held at 6:15 p.m. Mondays at the Douglass Community Center, 1000 W. Paterson St.
